M.I. - Love Is A Choice

Love can feel amazing on Monday and exhausting by Friday, so what are we actually building our relationships on: emotion, or decision? We’re getting honest about a simple truth that a lot of people avoid saying out loud: love is a choice, not just a feeling. Feelings shift, chemistry comes and goes, and life has a way of testing anyone who promises “forever.” The difference-maker is commitment and intentional effort, the kind you bring even when it’s uncomfortable.

We talk about why so many relationships collapse at the first sign of hardship, and how the modern divorce conversation can turn quitting into the default option. I also draw a hard line between normal hard seasons and real harm. Supporting someone through job loss, grief, depression, or health struggles is part of partnership. But “ride it out” does not mean staying in situations that involve abuse, theft, or constant chaos. Choosing love still includes boundaries, safety, and self-respect.

Then we get into the image problem: when love becomes a social media prop, a highlight reel, or an accessory for likes, the real work gets ignored. Saying “I love you” is easy. Living it looks like showing up, staying honest, and doing the unglamorous work that keeps a bond strong when nobody is clapping.

If you want grounded relationship advice, marriage mindset clarity, and a real take on commitment, press play. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review. Do you believe love is a feeling, a choice, or both?

Transcript

Morning Welcome And Big Idea

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Good morning, and this is Coolin's Morning Inspirations. I'm your host, Michael Tarrell. And this morning, I wanted to talk to you guys about love is a choice, not just

Choosing Love Over Feelings

SPEAKER_00 0:10

a feeling. Feelings, they change, but commitment and intentional effort is what keeps a relationship going. I could hate you today, love you tomorrow, not be be so-so about it one day and and and and head over hills for you the next. But in order for you to make a relationship work, it takes commitment and effort. And like I said, intentional effort. Like you gotta go into it knowing that you want it to work. A lot of times that, you know, because it doesn't feel good, you want it to end right then, or you'll start doing things to make it be worse. But it it takes, it it takes effort to fight through whatever the hard times is to make it to the other side of the rainbow. A lot of times we don't even make it that far because the first hardship that we have, we're ready to give up this this this day and age.

Why People Quit Too Fast

SPEAKER_00 1:02

The divorce rate is crazy. Sometimes I even try to figure out why people even get married this day and age. When a lot of times you go into it knowing that this ain't forever. There's always a way for me to get up out of here. And it all depends on what gender you are or what um you know financial demographic you are, you'll come out worse than you did when you went into it. But that old we were together through good times and bad, that's special. That to me is very special when you can find somebody that even when feelings change, you still down

Hard Times Versus Real Harm

SPEAKER_00 1:38

the ride. And I'm not talking about ride or die, like if that person's beating on you, stealing from you, um, you know, they're getting locked up over dumb crap and you gotta do everything on your own type stuff. Now that's different, of course. There's always an exception to the rule. But if we're talking about somebody lose their job, somebody lose their leg, somebody come up on hard times, somebody's going through something emotionally, physically, spiritually, and because they're going through that, you're wanting to quit. Love is such an easy thing to say. I love you. Ah man, I love such and such. That's just a word. Love more so is should be an action. And not just through the good times, through the bad times, too. And it's not, it's not a hundred percent good, it's not gonna be 80 good, 20 bad. It's a roller coaster. You're gonna go through ups and downs, lefts and rights, loop-de-loops. That's what a relationship is. You know, the funny thing is a lot of people get married and they say till death do us part. It never says till you fall on hard times. It doesn't say because it's not fun no more. I it's hard to sit out here and watch, you know, people go through divorce 24-7 and then think that you meet somebody and the first thing that you can think of is getting married. Oh, I would love to be married for what? If it's not gonna be forever. We all say that we fear God and and and and and we want somebody that that that is into to the church and all this other good stuff, but be the first one that wants to quit, the first one that wants to say, Hey God, I know what I I committed to you that I said, you know, with you present and my family present, but I I I don't think I was really, I don't think I was really for real about it. It's weird. And then you could love this person today and then hate them and want to take them for everything that they have or or or want to destroy their reputation or or or whatever the case may be when it's over. I it it's the it's the craziest thing

Marriage Vows And Accountability

SPEAKER_00 3:48

to me. It makes it to where it's like, is love really real in 2026? Or is this just a fashion show? Is a significant other nothing more than um an accessory, something to post on Facebook and Instagram and YouTube, something to make TikToks about when you're getting a divorce and you want to have a divorce party, celebrating my divorce, celebrating being single again. Mom man, y'all look like clowns. You look like clowns. You're celebrating failure because you failed. And I'm not saying you failed as an individual. The commitment that you had gave in front of God has failed. And everybody wants to point the finger, ah, it was my the my husband was this or my wife did this. At the same time, like y'all both failed. So a lot of times it sounds good and it looks good. Walking down that aisle, you got the you got the the preacher or whoever, you know, the ordained person that's gonna be giving y'all away or or or or or making that bond secure. And a lot of times people stand up there knowing that they're not even all in all the way into whoever they're with. It's a commitment. Love is a powerful thing when you really have it. And the feelings fade away, but love should never. That's that old school stuff. And it was like, well, she stuck around because she ain't have no choice. People have choices, people have always had choices. Now, did they stay around because they wanted they they did they wanted to use this person? Well, that's that's going on to this day. Uh if it's really real, it's powerful.

What Real Love Looks Like

SPEAKER_00 5:22

I think it's a bond by the most high when you can find somebody that you can ride, ride out with. I'm not gonna say ride or die, but you can ride out with. Good and bad. Someone that's gonna rub your back when you feel at your worst. Someone that's gonna brighten up your day at the end of the day. And sometimes they might not brighten up your day at the end of the day, but you might have to go to a quiet place for a little while, but then you come out of that and that person's right

Stop Using Love Like A Trend

SPEAKER_00 5:46

there with you. So don't use the word lightly. And when you when you do, be for real with it. Don't just don't just say it as something easy to say and do, or something that's being trendy at the moment, or a slight feeling that you have you being infatuated with a person more than

Final Reminder And Sign Off

SPEAKER_00 6:03

loving them. Yeah, remember, like I said earlier, love is not just a feeling because feelings fade, feelings change, but more so a commitment and intentional effort to make a relationship work. Have a good day. I'm out.